Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Chocolate Rain and the Nasty Japanese Men

Ninja Assassin

I've already expressed my love for Rain in a previous post, but now having seen the ridiculously fun Ninja Assassin, I feel the need to speak out once again...

Ninja Assassin is a very silly film, the story is contrived, the characters two dimensional and the acting wobbling from wooden to over the top, but it is saved by two things: Balls to the wall gory ninja fight scenes and Rain himself.

Bouncing back from the unimpressive Speed Racer, Rain's physical form is now that of an Adonis. His abs are as Koreans like to say "chocolate" to the extreme and his martial arts moves are on a par with any modern action star. For God's sake the man does handstands on a bed of nails! Watching the film I was reminded of a young Arnold Schwarzenegger in Conan the Barbarian (though slighter in form); he speaks little, but is a large presence on screen.

Ninja Assassin was able to please both the 14 year old boy inside of me and the 40 year old ajumma. Its nasty, blood soaked ninja antics enthralled me for the all too brief 99 minutes of screen time and unlike most modern day three hour blockbusters I was left with a relatively ache free bottom and a hankering for more.

Now go my children, runt to the nearest multiplex and seek out this chocolate ninja, for he is the future of Korean cinematic heroes and the future is good...

Ninja Assassin

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